Only recently has the issue of who pays for the first date come to the forefront of public discourse. If you turn the clock back a few short decades, the answer was not only clear, but it was also widely known.
The guy is the one who needs to pay for the first date, according to the rules. In non-heterosexual relationships, the person who takes the initiative is the one who tends to lead the relationship. In 2021, the person who sets the date is the one who needs to pay for the first date, or the bill is split evenly between the two parties.
With each generation, dating norms and customs shift slightly, and that is perfectly normal. Some aspects of first dates remain the same, but for the most part, we have moved on to more modern methods of communication.
Although some widespread dating practices from the old days have been abandoned, I believe it is still essential to maintain them because they were in place for a good reason.
For example, when a guy pays for the very first date, he is demonstrating his willingness to provide for the lady.
However, just because today’s women are capable of providing for themselves and their partners does not imply that they should do so on the first date. In particular, if you want to have the impression that you’re on a standard romantic date.
With that in mind, let’s take a look at all of the possible responses to the question of who ends up paying on the first date.
The first date is paid for by the man.
Having to pay for the first date gives me the impression that I am trying to fulfill the role of provider. And it’s nice to be able to feel differently.
Despite the fact that this is something that differs from person to person, there is a natural affinity for the roles of provider and leader among people.
Let’s take it from this perspective: what is it that you are hoping to gain from a female partner on a fundamental level?
Many different desires will be expressed by most men, all of which tend to revolve around one central theme: nurturing.
They are looking for a woman who can provide them with a sense of compassion, belonging, care, and affection that is naturally associated with women.
In other words, if you’re entering a relationship dynamic with the presumption that a woman will be nurturing towards you, you should be prepared to take on the role of a provider yourself.
Then it’s the same with women who are out on the town looking for love. Simply reverse the roles to correspond to the current situation.
It has to be done by someone. This is especially true for people who are very old-fashioned in their outlook. It exemplifies the concept of Yin and Yang perfectly.
If this is your point of view, the man should be the one to pay for the initial meeting.
The person who sets the date is the one who is responsible for the date.
Things are about to get more interesting. The world has shifted dramatically in recent years. Women are not only more energized in general, but they are also better off financially, despite the looming pay disparity between men and women.
To be honest, you would be hard pushed to find a woman in 2020 who is unable to care for herself, provided she is optimistic and does not refuse to put in the necessary effort.
Consequently, if she is capable of providing for herself, what is the point of the rule requiring men to cover the cost of the first date?
You might also reasonably argue that he should because tradition dictates that he should. Alternatively, it could be the desire to provide despite the fact that she is capable of taking care of herself that attracts him.
However, if you are not inclined to examine things in such a factual manner, you can simply attribute the problem to the person who initiated the transaction.
In other words, the person who sets the date is the one who must pay the date, regardless of whether the person is a man or a woman.
It’s straightforward, logical, equitable, and realistic. I’ve asked you out on a date, and I intend to cover the cost of the date. Okay, that’s great!
Divide the bill equally amongst yourselves.
It appears that the strategy of splitting the bill evenly has gained a great deal of acceleration over the last decade or so.
It takes away any expectations from the date, relieves one party of the burden of fitting a large bill, and removes the sense of fear towards the party who pays from the equation. It is a win-win situation.
Aside from being extremely fair, this approach is effective as well.
Nobody turns away from a first date with anything in their possession, even if things don’t work out at all in the end.
In addition, if you’re looking to meet a lot of new people or casually date a lot of people, this is the approach to take.
Take this into consideration before deciding who will pay for the first date.
Despite the assertions that both males and females can pay for a date in this day and age, this is not the case as a general rule of thumb.
You never really know what someone’s financial situation is like until you’ve gotten to know them well enough to understand their situation.
So think about whether or not the person you’re going on a date with has the financial means to pay for it.
If you have a suspicion that they won’t be able to pay and you are able to, either pay for it or split the bill equally.
Also, if there is indeed a financial problem, choose a more affordable date. See this list of 50 first-date ideas for some inspiration. Many of them are reasonably priced and extremely entertaining.
A person’s chemistry with you, your connection with them, and the bond you can form with them are all important factors in a date.
Allow that to guide you in your search for someone who will truly knock your socks off.
As soon as you get past the initial awkwardness, you’ll find that first dates can be a lot of fun.
Make an effort not to overanalyze things and to concentrate on having fun.